It's been three days now since Jenelle Evans went a little bit crazy at the filming of the Teen Mom 2 reunion, and people still can't stop talking about it.
Because why would you stop talking about such a beautiful, trashy mess?
According to witness on the scene of the meltdown, Jenelle flipped out because she saw Nathan Griffith's new girlfriend, Ashley Landhardt, give her mother a hug.
Sure, Jenelle won't hug her mother because she feels like she wronged her somehow by taking care of her son when she decided partying was more important than parenting.
But that doesn't mean that good ol' Barbara Evans can just go around, hugging anyone she pleases.
Jenelle started yelling at Ashley for the transgression, not paying any mind to all the kids that were running around nearby or, you know, the fact that she was at a work event.
In Nathan's version of events, Jenelle chased Ashley down a hallway in the studio, screaming at her and cussing at her in classic Jenelle fashion.
He asked for security, but no one ever came -- though eventually Chelsea Houska stepped in to take poor Kaiser to a safer place.
He said that he and Ashley were trying to calm the situation for the sake of the children, but Jenelle just couldn't drop the drama, but in Jenelle's story, she was the innocent victim in all of this.
According to her version of how things went down, Ashley attacked her so viciously that security had to pin her against the wall, and all she was trying to do was give Kaiser a hug.
The two stories are pretty different, right? Which is weird when you consider that cameras were rolling, so one of their stories can easily be proven false.
Also, there were lots of people around -- MTV reality stars with active social media accounts and the willingness to dive into the fray.
And that's exactly what Randy Houska did.
Randy, Chelsea's father, likes to gossip about the show, which is fair -- who doesn't? And last weekend's shenanigans were very, very easy to gossip about.
He kicked things off by throwing out some sass about David Eason's great balloon fiasco. You remember, that time at the filmed party Friday night when he took out a pocket knife and stabbed a bunch of balloons.
After tweeting about how he missed a connecting flight home, someone replied with a joke about how he probably missed the flight because of balloons blocking his way.
"I left my knife at the party," Randy wrote. "I loaned it out and it was not returned."
Beautiful, right? And it only gets better.
Once the news of the fight really started making the rounds, he tweeted that he watched both Nathan and Jenelle's videos, and that everything happened exactly as Nathan described it.
"Not that I am going to spill stuff out," he said, "but I just want people to know what is truth and what is not to help prevent rumors."
He probably also wanted to get back at Jenelle, who's been pretty cruel to both Randy and Chelsea recently. Remember when she called him a "fat f-ck"?
Randy's statement was pretty tame, but David still felt the need to lash out at him on Instagram.
See, according to Jenelle, MTV refused to serve alcohol to David at that party. That's why he got mad and stabbed all those poor balloons.
To hold up this story, David posted a video on Instagram of himself playing beer pong at the party -- he called it a "fake game" because there was "no beer."
Someone asked him if the video was filmed before MTV cut him off, and he responded with "Nope they told me there was no beer the whole time and Randys fat ass is just mad I stole his jello shots lil bitch."
One of David's followers told him to hush because "you'll never be half the man Randy is," and David hit back with "Obviously ... he looks like a oversized bean bag chair."
Because you kind of have to resort to jokes about someone's appearance when you're a terrible human being who is constantly in the wrong, we guess.
Randy saw a screenshot of David's remarks, and he tweeted "Good Lord. I will address this tonight since I actually have a job to tend to. I can win this sh-t all day long."
Later, after getting some dentistry in, he explained that the jello shots in question were ones that MTV had made for a game called Jello Shot Roulette.
He was sitting by the table where the game was set up, and when David grabbed a couple of shots, he informed him that they were supposed to be saved for filming, so to be sassy, David "grabs about 8 of them."
As always, some people called him out for gossiping, and he responded with this:
"I get that I am an 'old man' & should not be slinging sh-t on twitter but kids are involved so I will go there and my sh-t is true #TeamDoris"
OK, now here's where things start to get a little complicated: there's a Twitter account that's supposed to belong to Jenelle's rep, but most people think it's just a secondary account for Jenelle herself.
That account tweeted a screenshot of a text message exchange between a producer and Jenelle in which the producer asked who leaked all the gossip from the reunion.
Jenelle answered that it was "Chelsea kail cole Leah Nathan and Ashley Nathan's gf," and the producer said that they "really need to get to the bottom of this" because "we can't do a show like this with people talking sh-t."
Sure, it's way likely a producer said all that, Jenelle definitely didn't put all that into a text message generator or anything.
Kailyn Lowry replied to the screenshot with "I wasn't even there ... why am I being brought into it?"
Chelsea replied too, writing "Even the thought of cole talking about drama with a tabloid makes me giggle lol I could see why they would think every1 else..but cole?! Lol."
Randy revealed that Cole wasn't even at the party when the balloon incident took place, he was back at the hotel with Watson and Aubree.
David asked Chelsea where he was, and when she told him, he told her "that's what grandparents are for."
In David and Jenelle's world, maybe.
A little while later, Randy hopped back on Twitter to explain that David was never "cut off" from drinking, but that MTV had scheduled periodic "alcohol timeouts" so that no one would get too wasted to film.
Gary Shirley of Teen Mom OG fame tweeted that "People don't release the blessing this show is for their personal gain hope they don't ruin it for themselves and others. Shoot."
Jo Rivera responded to the whole story with a series of laughing emojis, and Courtland Rogers, Jenelle's first husband, responded with "I don't think that I have ever disliked someone this much in my entire life," referring to David, "so to see some funny sh-t like this ..."
Leah Messer didn't think it was all that funny though -- she wrote "My friend was terrified actually. You just don't know what to expect from anyone these days, and over alcohol??"
"Last I checked, we were there to work and film a celebration while having a few drinks. It wasn't the time to get lit..."
So that's Randy, Kailyn, Chelsea, Gary, Jo, Courtland, Nathan, and Leah, all coming down on Jenelle and David for their ridiculous actions.
Wonder what kind of meltdown we're going to see over this?
